Amanda Kyle, MA, CCC-SLP
At some point, all parents (especially toddler parents) ask themselves, ‘When is my child going to eat more than 3 foods?’ and then follow up with, “and why do all three of those foods have to be processed carbs?” So whether your child is actually a toddler or just a toddler in the terms of “eating age,” it’s important to understand what to expect as your child begins to expand the variety of foods they eat.
The first, and most important, concept to remember is this: variety in eating is actually the last of priority items when it comes to learning to eat. When eating skills come on board, both in typically eating kids, as well as kids where oral eating is delayed, the body has other concerns first. So here’s the body’s progression when it begins to consider eating.
First, safety.
When eating, a person’s body will prioritize breathing, posture (stable seating protects the brain from injury), and swallow safety first and foremost. This is why we want to make sure that we have good, supportive seating with foot support, helping the body align to use those eating skills as well as ensuring that the child feel safe.
The body also places anxiety management in this same “safety” category, meaning that we want to make sure that mealtime anxieties are well-managed. If you are in ‘fight, flight or flee’ (i.e. panic, anxiety, or over eating because one of these priorities were a concern at some point), then there is no room for eating in that moment: the anxious feeling in the chest and tummy mask the feeling of appetite because the body will prioritize escaping immediate danger (anxiety) over the longterm need for nutrition. This is why no pressure mealtimes and appropriate meal structure are so important. Division of Responsibility helps to alleviate the sense of impending doom so that the child feels safe enough to explore foods – familiar and new!
The Second priority with the body for eating is skill.
Caregivers need to consider and present the child with foods that are within their skill level. If a food is too difficult, they will not be able to properly break it down to feel safe to swallow it. Additionally, if they have too much of a difficult food, they will fatigue too rapidly to get enough volume to satisfy their needs. Advancing skill comes from practice at the level that they are at, with little bits of more advanced foods. When we are weaning (and we do this with new eating toddlers), we need to meet them where their oral motor skills fall so that they can successfully eat to meet those needs while building strength and endurance. As they grow in skill and endurance, then they can begin to branch out for variety.
This brings us to the body’s third priority: variety.
Variety is something that caregivers need to be consistent in presenting long before they expect their kiddo to eat it. That said, we recognize that one of the top concerns for families with typically eating toddlers as well as families who have just weaned (so eating age toddlers) is variety and a ‘balanced diet’ and ‘getting everything in them’. But this fear is not often connected to the way that kids begin to add foods to their repertoires.
Kids tend to gravitate to easy to eat, consistent (meaning they feel and break down the same every single time) foods. This is where you tend to see the big swing in toddlers where they only want to eat their favorites, which are often processed foods (crunchy carbohydrates like goldfish or crackers, chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, etc). And, while these foods have a place on anyone’s plate (unless an allergy or the like prevents it), they should not be the whole plate.
Caregivers, continue to offer foods both that are accepted and that your kids are still learning about so that when they are ready, kids can move those newer foods and textures over into the ‘accepted’ category. Keep in mind that even typically eating kids, who have never had a hard time eating can need at least 10 introductions to a new foods before being willing to try it (and our kids that have had a history often need closer to 40). However, when we make offering a variety of foods in a low-pressure way, we are setting them up to be successful in exploring and accepting them (and others) when they are ready.