Where to Sit?
By Amanda Kyle, MA, CCC-SLP
One of the parent jobs in the Division of Responsibility is “where to sit”. There are the obvious choices, like in a high chair, at a table, or even at picnic on the floor. Sometimes, when you are out and about, this could look like in a stroller or in your lap. But what should we be considering when making this choice? And what should we NOT consider?
Let’s start with what NOT to consider!
The one consideration parents do not need to make is which sitting positions will ‘get’ them to eat more, whether this be through novelty or catering to short attention spans. Parents often think that if they try several eating positions at each offer, they will get their child to eat more than they would have otherwise. And honestly? You might get at best a couple more bites, but the effort is not worth the intake. And in the long run? Changing positions will stop working.
Some things to consider when choosing your seating plan:
What works in your space?
Do you have room for a high chair? Should we use a booster in a chair at your table? Would you like to have picnics on the floor, where can you sit together as a family? If you only have a bar height, would standing in an activity tower be better?
What option is safe?
One of the things that the body will prioritize is feeling safe and stable because this protects the brain from a fall. If your child is working very hard to feel stable in their chair, they will not eat well. So, does your child need an option with a seatbelt? Do we need higher postural support, such as a tall back or sides to give hip support? How can we provide foot support (this one is huge! Dangling legs are very uncomfortable – think of sitting in a bar height chair with nowhere to put your feet!)?
What sensory needs are in place?
Some bigger kids (toddlers and beyond) need to move or fidget to feel their bodies. Can we give an inflatable disk to sit on? Theraband around the legs of the chair that they can push on with their feet? Or can they stand at the table can help give this input?
Do they need some more connection?
If your child is having some increased anxiety around meals, then moving to sitting in your lap is a great option! This can provide support (physically and emotionally) and be very calming.
Does their body have good support?
Have you ever tried eating in a hammock? Your body is in such a tricky position, including your hips! Some toddler chairs, place your hips in this “C” position we want to avoid.
Keep in mind that if the body is too relaxed, it will not allow the muscles to engage in successful eating. Having an active trunk (belly and back core muscles) will help the limbs (arms, legs and jaw) move more successfully.
Is it comfortable?
If you are unsure of if a position is affecting your child’s ability to eat, put yourself in the same position (including your head and neck). If it is tricky for you, it will be tricky for them!
Ultimately, we want meals to be a low stress, enjoyable experience. If your child has negative associations with a particular seating arrangement, then trying another option can be helpful. When making these decisions, take into account all of these different aspects to make the best decision on where to feed your child. This is a foundation skill to successful meals!