Elisabeth Kraus, MA
This weekend, my tiniest human (the one who had ALL the eating challenges in her early years) got a NASTY stomach bug! And even though she's been a great eater for more than 6 years, I still felt all of that anxiety come right to the surface! So, I thought it might be helpful to some of you for me to explain how I approached my non-eating, sick kiddo, and what I watched for to make sure she was safe and comfortable.
I listened to her, and trusted her to listen to her body. She did some serious vomiting for a while, so NOT eating isn't just normal. It's expected. So, I just let her not eat.
I made her a little nest on the couch, so she could be near mama (and her puke bowl). I put a cool cloth and/or soft ice pack on the back of her neck for comfort. And I focused my attention on just being with her – not on being her feeding tube.
I focused on hydration more than I focused on nutrition. Sitting with her, I offered frequent sips of pedialyte, ice water, and iced tea (cinnamon is her favorite). When I noticed that she hadn't peed much, I offered pedialyte popsicles, jello, and canned peaches as well. She only accepted the popsicle, and I trusted her to know what felt good in her body.
When she turned down a sip, I put the cup down and waited a bit before offering again.
For the first 36 hours or so? She ate ONE piece of toast. And that's it! And that was ok. I still offered a few chances to eat foods that would be easy on her tummy, but I didn't make her come to the table or even bring the food to her unless she gave me a "yes, that sounds good."
I never weighed her. Not once – not during illness. Not after. Did she lose weight? Probably. Does it matter? Nope. Everyone loses a bit of weight when they’re sick, and everyone bounces back.
When I noticed energy pick up just a bit, I started more regular offerings of gentle foods (applesauce, toast, banana (which she refused every time), broth, apple slices, popsicles, jello). I offered what I chose to offer, and I let her decide if she wanted to eat and how much.
I did not offer any rescue foods if she turned down what I offered, but I did keep a few drink options (ice water and iced tea) near her all day.
I watched what came out -- pee, yes, but interactions with me and with big sister, as well as general engagement, more than anything else. Because I trust myself to know her. And if something seemed really off? I trust myself to know that and to seek attention from her pediatrician.
And what did she do?
She recovered.
About 48 hours after the puking stopped, her energy started picking up, and eating slowly did as well. About 4 days after her vomiting stopped, her eating picked up just a bit, which told me she was ready for more regular offers in her more typical routine. At about day 5, she was nearing her normal self and eating came right back on board that day and in the days following.
So, when you navigate the never-ending illnesses (and you will, because...kids!), put on the glasses that remind you to look at your kiddo as an oral child (even if they get a bit of tube support), and allow them the grace to do what sick kids do: to stop eating, to rest, to snuggle, to drink, and to slowly heal and come back to normal.